How Do You Know When It’s Time to Downsize?

Over the last couple of months, I’ve had numerous people—both clients and their kids—tell me that they or their loved ones, usually their parents, should have downsized five years earlier.

It got me thinking: How do you time this right?

What prevents someone from making the change at the right time?

On the other side of that conversation, someone is often lamenting that they missed a hotter market or, more importantly, lost the capacity to make the change on their own terms.

Kids are often more involved as well, which can be both a blessing and a complication depending on the relationship and expectations.

If I were to sum it up, there’s something to be said for being able to make the change before it’s made for you.

Listen to the Signals

One of the key, understated skills I lean on as a Realtor is listening. Listening for signals and clues.

Over time, I’ve learned to pay attention to the things people say that may be almost unconscious.

Sometimes it sounds like, “We just can’t keep up with this anymore.” Or, “The work is becoming too much.” Or simply, “There’s always something that needs to be done.”

Most commonly, these signals come from homeowners who have spent decades enjoying the process of maintaining and beautifying their properties.

Then something changes.

The satisfaction they once got from the work is gradually overtaken by what feels like an overwhelming burden.

Another signal can come from a spouse, partner or family member who starts expressing concern.

“I don’t want you up on that ladder anymore.”

Or:

“I don’t want you shoveling the driveway anymore.”

Maybe someone slipped and fell on the ice while shoveling last winter and was out of commission for three weeks.

These things can be easy to dismiss until they aren’t.

But Sometimes You’re Just Not Ready

On the other hand, I’m also with people who are clearly not ready to downsize.

Their stage of life and their plans simply call for something different.

I’ll hear things like, “We want a place big enough to have everyone home for the holidays.” Or, “The grandkids are coming, and we want room for everyone.”

A couple in this stage may actually need more space—or simply a different configuration of space.

There’s nothing wrong with that.

Downsizing isn’t automatically the right answer just because someone has reached a certain age.

For some people, the next chapter is actually about making their home work better for the life they want to live.

What Does Your Next Chapter Look Like?

Some people talk about their “golden years” from the perspective that they’ve put in their time focusing on everyone else and are ready to make the next chapter more about themselves.

That picture often looks quite different.

Maybe it means less clutter, more travel and fewer responsibilities that tie them to the house.

Maybe it means living somewhere more walkable, closer to friends, restaurants, parks and the things they enjoy.

Maybe it means simply having a home that is easier to lock up and leave for a few weeks without worrying about everything that needs to be looked after.

Personally, our decision to make a change came from a combination of these factors.

We had our girls younger than many of our peers, and we have a small family. Jess and I enjoy travelling, and we like urban living in a walkable location surrounded by nature and amenities.

The decision wasn’t immediate.

It started with some dreaming and scheming.

A puzzle to solve.

What type of housing would allow us to live closer to the core, have enough space for our kids and, eventually, grandchildren, while also allowing us to spend more time away without the responsibilities that came with a larger property?

We didn’t have the answer right away.

We started exploring.

When Your Family Sees Something You Don’t

There’s another important part of this conversation: the role your loved ones can play.

Many people want to stay in their home for as long as possible.

I hear things like, “Where would I go?” “Where would I find something like this?” “I don’t want to leave my home.”

For many people, the thought of giving up the yard, the maintenance, the familiar surroundings and the memories attached to their home simply isn’t an option.

This is delicate, and it’s common.

I think it’s important to respect those wishes.

At the same time, it can be valuable to stay open to the advice of the people you trust. Your kids, siblings or close friends may see something you aren’t seeing.

If you trust that they have your best interests in mind, involving them in your plans can actually help you remain in your home longer and on your own terms.

That might mean planning for additional care or handing more of the maintenance over to contractors.

It might mean making modifications to the home.

And sometimes it can mean exploring entirely different living arrangements—perhaps having trusted, compatible people in your life move into the home with you to make things easier as you age.

There isn’t one right answer.

Make the Decision on Your Terms

As with almost everything related to real estate, there is no one-size-fits-all solution.

Your interests, your relationships and your plans for how you want your lifestyle to look will ultimately determine whether it’s time to downsize.

Maybe you want to travel more.

Maybe the yard has become more work than enjoyment.

Maybe you’re tired of maintaining a home with rooms you rarely use.

Maybe your family is beginning to express concern.

Or maybe none of those things apply—and that’s okay too.

The important thing is to start thinking about it before you have to.

Because if there is one thing I’ve learned from talking to people who wish they had made the change sooner, it’s this:

You’re probably going to want to make the decision on your own terms.